Workplace Romance: Business with Pleasure

In the spirit of the Valentine’s season, it’s fitting to bring up the topic of workplace romance. Given the amount of hours we spend with coworkers on a weekly basis, forming relationships that extend beyond the workplace is sometimes inevitable. Early in my career I've sworn that I would never date anyone in the workplace. But an interesting coincidence put me in a dilemma.

Some years ago I met a gentleman that I oddly had a lot in common with. We even had the same major in college and our initial conversation seemed like the makings of a great dating relationship. But apparently we were little too much alike, because I also found out that he would be starting a new job that very next day. And out of all places, it was the company that I was currently working for in the same department. So do I bring everything to a halt or proceed with caution? How is workplace romance viewed in today’s workforce anyway?

According to a WorkplaceOptions survey, how it may be viewed depends on your age. 84 percent of Millennial workers (ages 20-31) say they would have a romantic relationship with a co-worker, compared to just 36 percent of Generation X workers (ages 32-48) and 29 percent of Baby Boomers (age 49-68). Management columnist and author of In Office Hours, Lucy Kellaway says, “It’s one of the worst decisions you can possibly make. Office romances are… complicated and unprofessional.” Whether your point of view is new school or old school here are some things to consider:

What is your company policy? Some companies have rigid policies against workplace fraternization either with those you work with internally or externally. It’s important to know what those are ahead of time.

What is the corporate culture? Look around-- your workplace may not be the best place to hook up. Are there couples married as a result of meeting in the workplace or is there an unspoken rule that makes it taboo?

What are the long term affects? In the beginning the thought may seem rosy. But could a relationship bring on real or perceived favoritism which could create scorned co-workers or worst yet a lawsuit?

The dynamics of a romantic relationship in the workplace can prove to be complex and there are definitely many more questions to consider. Just remember in the workplace with the matters of the heart, be smart.

Moving You Forward,

Cathy Francois

Career Coach

Founder of Rezume Forward

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Reality TV: Trashy TV or Lessons to Treasure?

Yes, reality television is one of my favorite guilty pleasures; Real Housewives of Atlanta, Chicagolicious… and Shahs of Sunset might be growing on me. I don’t get a kick out of the cat fights or the wig tugging. But, I do have an appreciation for the more subtle moments where career and business transactions are being made, and lessons are being learned. I’m especially more interested in the characters that are driven entrepreneurs and live for the actual real moments, even if it’s just some nuggets of knowledge. Oh, and the drama… just keeps it interesting. So I’ve taken some snippets of real moments that you can apply in real life to achieve career success.

Make Real Connections.  No, the faux friends you have on Facebook don’t count. Not to discredit social media (love it!), but remember it’s a bridge for real connections to be made. Please do not get confused, I’m not necessarily talking about rubbing elbows with Donald Trump or Bravo TV’s Andy Cohen, who both by the way attributed themselves to Real Housewives of Atlanta star, Nene Leakes’ success (she stated otherwise). What I am saying is, foster positive relationships by starting with the people around you, like your neighbor across your cubical and in your community. Because you never know where a real connection may lead you. 

Be Likable. Again, not as in the 20 “likes” on your photo planking on top of the stove. Being likable goes hand-in-hand with making real connections. It’s hard to keep connections with an "all-about-ME” attitude. We all know there’s no “I” in TEAM and you’ll need a great one around you to achieve success like the team at AJ's Salon of Style Network's Chicagolicious. Even if you’re confident in what you do, embrace your talents graciously or end up in the NFL (no friends left) zone.

Give Back. Let’s keep it real, not all of us need to start a foundation at once, because you know that’s popular in Hollywood. We can all give back in small ways, such as sharing best practices with your team, giving a colleague a good referral, and sharing your gifts with the underserved. Some people may remember and one day return the favor, but do not give to receive, which goes back to the first point about making real connections.

So the next time you're getting ready to have your reality TV fix, put down your smartphone, bring out the pen and paper, and get ready to be schooled. It's lesson time!

Moving you forward,

Cathy Francois
Career Coach
Founder of Rezume Forward

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